Some Detested Things in Weddings

Question :

His Eminence, Shaikh Muhammad bin Salih Al-'Uthai- minmay Allah preserve him.

May the peace of Allah and His mercy and blessings be upon you.

Your Eminence the Shaikh, in recent times and on the occasion of the start of the summer holidays, the number of wrongdoings which occur during wedding celebrations has increased, in houses and in banquet halls. These are worse and uglier in banquet halls. These include; beating (drums) through loudspeakers, women singing, filming on video, and worse than that the groom kisses his bride in front of the women.

Where is the modesty and the fear of Allah? When a word of advice is given by those who are zealous in avoiding those things which Allah has forbidden, they oppose them by saying: "Shaikh so-and-so has ruled that it is permissible to use the Tabl."

If this is correct, are there not some general rules and limits for this Tabl that could be made clear to everyone in order to control these irresponsible people? We request your Emi- nence to make the truth clear to Muslims, and may Allah reward you with goodness and make your knowledge beneficial, and may Allah grant you success. And may peace of Allah, His mercy and His blessings be upon you.

In the Name of Allah, the Most Beneficent, the Most Me the Na And may the peace of Allah, His mercy and His blessings be upon you.

Answer:

The truth regarding the Duff during the days of the wedding feast is that it is permissible, or a Sunnah, if there is an announcement of the wedding, but there are conditions:

1. That the beating be with the Duff and that is what is known to some of the people as At-Tar-which is sealed at one end. The one that is sealed at both ends is the Tabl and that is not permissible, because it is a musical instrument, and all musical instruments are unlawful, except that whose permissibility is proved by some evidence and that is the Duff during the days of the wedding celebration.

2. That it is not accompanied by forbidden things, such as base, undignified singing, which excites lust. Because this is forbidden, whether it is accompanied by a Duff or not, and whether it is during the days of the wedding celebration or not.

3. That it does not lead to Fitnah, such as beautiful voices being heard by the men; so if this leads to a Fitnah, it is forbidden.

4. That it does not cause annoyance to anyone, for if it causes annoyance to anyone, it is forbidden. Such as when the voices are heard via loudspeakers, because this annoys the neighbors and others who are disturbed by it and also, it is not without Fitnah. The Prophet forbade the worshippers in prayer from raising their voices over one another during recitation, as this causes disturbance and annoyance, so what about voices, Duffs and singing?!

As for photographing the gathering with a camera, no rational person would doubt that it is evil, and no rational person, let alone a believer, would accept that his Mahrams, such as mothers, daughters, sisters, wives and others, be filmed in order to become a commodity which is shown to everyone, or the subject of fun and entertainment from which pleasure is obtained by every dissolute person looking at them.

And more evil than this, is the recording of the gathering with a video camera. Because the event is recorded live, with picture and sound. This is something rejected by every person of sound mind and correct religion. It is inconceivable that anyone possessing modesty and faith would deem it permissible.

As for women dancing; it is evil and we do not rule in favor of it due to what we have been told about the evil occurrences which take place as a result of it between women. And if it is done by men, it is even more evil. And if it is done by women and men together, as some of the ignorant people do, then it is even more portentous and evil, due to the mixing of men and women and the great Fitnah which it entails, especially since the occasion is one of marriage, and the desire engendered at wedding celebration.

As for what was mentioned by the questioner regarding the groom being in the presence of a number of women and kissing his bride in front of them, it is amazing that such a thing should come from a man whom Allah has blessed with marriage, then he greets her with this action which the Islamic Law, logic and morality condemn. How can he allow himself to take this action in front of women and in the state of desire engendered by the wedding celebration? And how can the family of the bride allow him to do so? Do they not fear that this man will see in this gathering of women one who is more beautiful and more attractive than his wife and that his bride might drop from his sight, and that many thoughts be revolving in his head, and that the end result between him and his bride might be unwelcome.

At the conclusion of my reply, I advise my Muslim brothers against undertaking such evil actions as these, and I call upon them to be thankful to Allah for this blessing, as well as others, and to follow the path of the righteous Salaf, being content within themselves with what was brought by the Sunnah, and not to follow the whims of a people who have misguided many and gone astray from the Straight Path.

And I ask Allah, Most High to grant my Muslim brothers and me success in achieving that which is beloved by Him and pleases Him. And that He helps us in remembering Him and thanking Him and improving our worship of Him. Verily, He is Near (to all by His Knowledge), Responsive. And may peace and blessings be upon our Prophet, Muhammad and upon his family and Companions.