✨Not Recounting Favors
All praise is due to Allah the Entirely Merciful, the Especially Merciful, the Most Generous. He gave His servants graces and dispelled calamities from them. He commanded them to be grateful and warned them from denial and misdeeds. And He promised to recompense them for their deeds. So whoever finds good, let him praise Allah, and whoever finds other than that shall not blame but himself. We praise Allah with the praise of the grateful and we seek His forgiveness with the repentance of the repentant. And we ask Him of His great favor. For He is the Most Generous, Most Merciful, Most Beneficent. Allah elevated whom He willed of His servants and made people need them. So he keeps them in in their positions as long as they benefit others. But if they were to withhold, He would take away their graces and transfer them to someone else. And the Messenger ﷺ urged his community to benefit and do good to others. And he ﷺ stated that the most beloved to Allah Almighty are the most beneficial to the people.
After servitude to Allah, there is nothing with a sweeter taste, more fulfilling and more joyful than striving in serving, benefiting and fulfilling the needs of others. And it is also from the servitude to Allah Almighty because Allah Almighty praised the doer of good and rewarded them for it. And benefiting people is from the good. Allah Almighty said:
Al Baqarah (2) 215: And whatever you do of good – indeed, Allāh is Knowing of it.
And Allah Almighty said:
Al Muzzamil (73) 20: And whatever good you put forward for yourselves – you will find it with Allāh. It is better and greater in reward.
And the Prophet ﷺ said:
Every act of goodness is charity. [Bukhari 6021, Muslim 1005]
And Allah, the Most High, rebuked the one who withheld goodness and said in describing the hypocrites:
At Tawbah (9) 67: Close their hands (refuse to spend in the way of Allah)
And they were warned of the fire. Allah Almighty said:
Qaff (50) 24-25: (24) [Allāh will say], Throw into Hell every obstinate disbeliever, (25) Preventer of good, aggressor, and doubter,
And the Prophet ﷺ said:
Indeed the people of the fire are every harsh, pompous and arrogant person. Hoarder and withholder. [Ahmad 7010]
And every blessing that Allah Almighty has bestowed upon a person is due a charity and an act of goodness, either obligatory or recommended. For wealth is a blessing and its charity is the mandatory Zakat, the obligatory expenditures and spending in the avenues of good. And influence is a blessing and its charity is advocating for and serving others and reconciling between people. And knowledge is a blessing and its charity is teaching it and spreading it. And the charity for what a person owns is lending it. Even a woman lending her jewelry, clothes for someone to adorn herself at a wedding or function. And Allah Almighty reproached the deniers in that they are:
Al Maoon (107) 6-7: (6) Those who make show [of their deeds] (7) And withhold [simple] assistance.
But many people nullify their acts of goodness. And they do not sense that their acts of goodness have vanished into thin air. And the sweetness of the act of goodness transforms into bitterness. And it changes from an act of goodness into an act of evil. And the person would have been better off had he not performed the act of goodness. He returns sinful and was previously rewarded. And that is Al Mannu Wal Atha as stated in the Quran. That is recounting one’s favors and causing injury. It is prohibited in whatever a person spends of charity or does of acts of goodness. Allah Almighty said:
Al Baqarah (2) 264: O you who have believed, do not invalidate your charities with reminders [of it] or injury
And that is through reminding the recipient of what he gave by saying, I gave you such and such. And he recounts his bestowals and corrupts them. And injury is reproaching the recipient. For example, he says to the recipient, how much you have asked and how much you have harmed me. And it is said that harm is to mention his spending on the recipient in front of someone that the recipient does not like to associate with. Or saying to the recipient, I have given you and I gave but you were not grateful.
And Allah, the Most High, likened reminding of favors and injury to the actions of a hypocrite. And the common aspect between them is nullifying the deed and the reward vanishing. Allah Almighty said:
Al Baqarah (2) 264: O you who have believed, do not invalidate your charities with reminders [of it] or injury as does one who spends his wealth [only] to be seen by the people and does not believe in Allāh and the Last Day.
That is, if you intended seeking Allah’s pleasure at the start of the matter, reminders of it and injury nullify your deeds. So your deeds become at the same level as someone who does deeds to show off and does not seek Allah’s pleasure and the home of the hereafter.
And the meaning is equating some of the Muslim charity givers who give seeking the reward but conclude their charities with reminders of them and injury with the disbelieving charity givers that spend their wealth only for showing off and praise. For they do not seek the reward of the hereafter.
And it is not permitted to recount the act of goodness except in the case of defending oneself and honor. For you may do good to some people but they slander you and deny your act of goodness and defame you. So you defend yourself by recounting your act of goodness to silence him put him in line. And Uthman, may Allah be pleased with him, did that when the Khawaarej made false accusations about him. So he responded to their accusations by mentioning his acts of goodness. And that is why talking about acts of goodness between people is disliked except in cases when the act of goodness is denied. And due to the ugliness of that, it was said, recounting ruins the act of goodness. And due to the virtue of recounting upon denial it was said, if the favor is denied, its value is enhanced. And from it is the words of Allah Almighty:
Al Hujurat (49) 17: They consider it a favor to you that they have accepted Islām. Say, Do not consider your Islām a favor to me. Rather, Allāh has conferred favor upon you that He has guided you to the faith, if you should be truthful.
And it is a clear injustice and great loss for someone to do an act of goodness and taste the sweetness of their action and anticipate the reward, then nullify it through recounting his favor and injury. And if he was unscathed, that is neither for him or against him, the matter would be easy. But rather it changes from a sin after it was rewarded. That is because the one recounting his favor is falling into one of the major sins. As Abu Dhar, may Allah be pleased with him, narrated that the Prophet ﷺ said:
There are three whom Allah will not speak to on the Day of Resurrection: the recounter of favors who does not give anything without reminding (the recipient of what he gave), and the one who sells his product by means of false oaths, the one who drags his lower garments below the ankles. [Muslim 106b]
And Ibn Sireen heard a man say to another man: I did you for you and I did such as such. So Ibn Sireen said, be silent for there is no good in an act of goodness if it is recounted. And Al Maawardy, may Allah have mercy on him, said, and know that the act of goodness has conditions without which it cannot be fulfilled or completed. And from that is protecting it from broadcasting that amplifies it and concealing it from a rumor that draw attentions to it. And from the conditions of the act of goodness is minimizing it so that he does not see it as a big thing. And downplaying it so it does not become exaggerated. So that it does not become a spoiled vanity and an exaggerated centerpiece. And Al Abbas bin Abdul Mutalib, may Allah be pleased with him, said, the act of goodness is not completed without three qualities; hastening, minimizing and concealing it. For if you hastened it you facilitated it, and if you minimized it you magnified it, and if you concealed it you completed it.
Oh Muslims:And if the recounter of favors thinks about his condition, he would realize that he is taking credit for something that he did not do and adorning himself with ugliness. That is because him performing the act of goodness is a guidance from Allah. And his ability to benefit people is a bestowal from Allah Almighty. For He is the One Who elevates him and He is the One Who demotes. And if he understood that, he would know that the favor is from Allah – the Most High – alone.
And the people who recount their favors and injure have various ways and methods of delivering the message of reminding. Some of them are frank and clear, enumerating in each gathering what they did for so-and-so. And some of them continue in their reminding and harm and do not stop. For if he steps in to help a student in his studies, he asks about his academic level every time that he sees him. And he does not really care and he only wants to remind him or his father that it was he who helped him. And if he gets involved to help someone get a job, he asks him on every occasion about his promotions and boss. And reminding is the only thing that he wants through that. And the people of knowledge are not immune from that. For if he taught a student, he reminds him that he taught him every time that he sees him. Especially if the student exceled and has attained knowledge, prestige, or wealth. And the ploys of those recounting favors have no end. And the wise are those who combat this devastating disease. For it is a wide entry point for satan. Through it, he corrupts the deeds. Abdul Rahman bin Zaid bin Aslam said, my father used to say, if you give someone something and then you sense that your greeting has become a burden for him, then stop greeting him.
And the scholars have stated that it is not befitting to ask the person receiving the favor for a supplication. And he should not expect his praise. Because perhaps it will be the price for his act of goodness and his reward will be dropped. If someone supplicates without being asked then one should respond by supplicating for him. And if he offers praise, then one should respond by attributing the favor to Allah Almighty. And when Musa, peace be upon him, watered the flocks of the two girls, he did not wait for praise, gratitude, supplication or a reward even though he was in need of food to diminish his hunger and a place to shelter him at night. Rather he supplicated his Lord the Exalted:
Al Qassas (28) 24: So he watered [their flocks] for them; then he went back to the shade and said, My Lord, indeed I am, for whatever good You would send down to me, in need.
We ask Allah Almighty to guide us to the best and most perfect character and to turn us away from bad and evil morals. Indeed Allah is All Hearing, Answering.
Ref:
أرسلها على تطبيق الواتساب 
